john bailie, PHD
Faith. Life. leadership.

This series of articles explores the toxic behavior profiles that persistently generate workplace conflict and provides tips on how to respond. In Creative vs. Toxic Conflict at Work , I discussed one of the key features that distinguishes toxic conflict from creative conflict. Creative conflict is rooted in the dynamics between people . In creative conflict, the motives and goals of group members are typically healthy and focused on a sincere desire to solve concrete extern

Some of the best leaders are drawn from the ranks of rebels – and also some of the worst. When you find yourself at the bottom of a pyramid and want to climb it, you have a limited set of options. The base of the pyramid is the largest part. You’re in the crowd. It is certainly important to be competent, but to advance you also have to be noticed. It is not enough to be good. You also have to be noteworthy. One option is to passionately serve those above you, make them look g

It’s tempting to believe that conflict in relationships is a complicated topic. Complicated is actually easy. A complicated problem implies a lower bar for success. We expect less measurable positive outcomes. When a problem with another person is seen as complicated we have many reasons to think about it some more, delay action and hesitate to say what we are really thinking. Why be hasty? After all, it’s complicated. However, the vast majority of interpersonal conflicts, wh

There’s a long Irish tradition of never letting the truth get in the way of a good story. In that spirit, here’s one of my favorite Yuletide yarns and a holiday lesson for leaders. In the year 325 AD, the emperor Constantine called the ecumenical council of Nicaea. It was the first of its kind. After several centuries of Christianity, things were starting to get a little theologically squirrelly. A little variation in tradition here and there was one thing, but some teachers

As you might remember from my article, Competence Beats Confidence , I attended a private military college during my undergraduate years. Stylish camouflage daywear, lots of yelling, brutal soul-crushing discipline… good times. I learned a lot during those years. However, the things that really stuck had nothing to do with military science, history, or literature. In an environment that intense, you learn a lot about your real potential and strengths. You also learn a great d

Effective leadership is always part theater. This doesn’t imply fakery or playing make-believe. It means that leadership is more than being competent, knowing what to do, and being willing to take risks. You also need to take-action in a way that is purposely intended to teach others how to do what you know how to do; to transfer your skills and expertise to those around you through your personal example and modeling. When I was a young counselor for troubled youth in a day-t

This series of articles explores the toxic behavior profiles that persistently generate workplace conflict and provides tips on how to respond. In Creative vs. Toxic Conflict at Work , I discussed one of the key features that distinguishes toxic conflict from creative conflict. Creative conflict is rooted in the dynamics between people . In creative conflict, the motives and goals of group members are typically healthy and focused on a sincere desire to solve concrete extern

A wise mentor once taught me that every effective team needs three people: a gas pedal, a steering wheel, and a brake. The gas pedal provides the needed energy to push the team into action. At optimal functioning, this is not an act of force or coercion. Instead, the gas pedal has a direct connection with, and brings access to, the fuel that makes any movement possible. In an organization, the gas pedal translates vision into action; potential into kinetic energy. The steer

The witching season is upon us. Halloween is the one holiday that officially celebrates the things that freak us out. It’s a tradition that reaches far back into history and the human psyche. In honor of the season, let’s consider Halloween's most iconic fright: the witch. Maleficent . Strega Nona ! And of course, the nemesis of my childhood nightmares, the Wicked Witch of the West . Perhaps like me, during this season in school you were forcibly compelled to read the witchy

When I saw the large knife clipped inside his waistband, my first feeling wasn’t fear. It was disappointment. I was walking up the stairwell to the main office like I did every morning. “How are you doing today, Carlos?” I asked with a smile. “Doing great today Mr. John,” he said back with a sleepy grin. “Kinda tired though... I worked late last night,” he said, stretching his arms above his head. That’s when I saw it; an oversized folding knife. Though fairly well-concealed,

When in doubt about whether to share what’s on your mind or engage a tough situation, its usually best to lean towards taking the risk. The core concepts , principles , creative strategies , and toxic behavior profiles covered on this blog are here to help you do that. After all, it’s the many small mundane interactions of each day that provide us with most of the opportunities to build better relationships with colleagues and push a team toward more candor and transparency.

Image by jurica-koletic @ unsplash At a recent leadership and digital technology event, I participated in an interesting experiment. The room was full of seasoned C-suite professionals and up-and-coming business leaders. We covered a diverse range of industries: pharma, biotech, higher education, IT, military/private security, supply chain management. The facilitator asked us to make a list of keywords that described how we wished to be seen by others in our respective fields

My recent article, Grow in Public: Leading Conflict Principle 6 , made the argument that a deliberately developmental culture is only made by cultivating deliberately developmental people. A deliberately developmental organizational culture persistently pushes team members to the edges of their current competencies. By definition, that is not a place where most people feel comfortable. Fear, insecurity, and conflict live in that place. It’s a reach into the unknown. How do

It’s hard to grow when others are watching. Even if we know that change is needed, there’s something we need to get better at, and that other people are depending on us – part of us always resists. Personal change and development feel risky. When we admit that we need to change our behavior, habits, skills, or worldview, we expose ourselves. It’s an admission that something about us is incomplete and unfinished. This shakes us out of the comfortable fiction that we are wholly

I loved 80’s punk music when I was kid. Ok, I liked some 90’s punk too . No, I’m not talking about Green Day. American Idiot is still a fun musical though… Disclaimer: I was never really a punk myself, but I always had a few punk friends in my social periphery as a teenager. I guess I was kind of a punk tourist, if that’s a thing. After I left the military in the mid-90’s, I found myself sharing rent in several admittedly sketchy collective living situations with lots of re

On September 11, 2001, I was working as a counselor for adjudicated and at-risk youth at a private school in southeastern Pennsylvania; about an hour-and-a-half from Manhattan. We had a typical morning gathering with our students. We held a circle. Staff and students did a short “check-in”, saying something about how they were feeling that morning. We discussed some goals for the week, then everyone went off to class. Around 8:45 EDT, like everyone else around the world that

I love monster movies. The bigger and meaner the monster, the better the movie. Alien. Predator. The Stay Puft Marshmallow Man . But when it comes to on-screen destruction, the undisputed heavyweight champ and model for all monsters that followed is undoubtedly Godzilla. Behind the cheesy effects and ridiculous rubber monster suits of the 1950’s and 60’s movies , there was a deep commentary on the tenuous nature of life in the atomic age. Godzilla’s origin story has varied a

Image by oliver-cole @ unsplash Sometimes doing something “close” to right isn’t good enough. As a father of four I find myself increasingly making use of dad-sayings that I learned from my own father, when discussing life’s most important matters with my children and others. Mind you, when these pearls of wisdom were dispensed to me as a young man I rolled my eyes, scoffed, or otherwise convinced myself that my father’s sage advice somehow didn’t apply to me. We all think

Image by janko-ferlic @ unsplash This series of articles explores the toxic behavior profiles that persistently generate workplace conflict and provides tips on how to respond. In Creative vs. Toxic Conflict at Work , I discussed one of the key features that distinguishes toxic conflict from creative conflict. Creative conflict is rooted in the dynamics between people . In creative conflict, the motives and goals of group members are typically healthy and focused on a sincer

Image by kristopher-roller @ unsplash Happiness is a feeling. Cheerfulness is a choice… and a weapon. By cheerfulness, I don’t mean schmaltzy niceties and fake smiles. Real cheerfulness means something much deeper. Cheerfulness is the ability to willingly, even gladly, bear the slings and arrows of life and relationships. The feeling of happiness comes and goes like weather. Cheerfulness can be deliberately chosen and cultivated as a virtue in leading conflict. The ability to